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(My Soul and My Character by Sharon Douglas)

Let us pray:              

Oh Great Spirit, I pray today for my soul.

Because I want strength to break away from bad habits

 which may move me away from having a positive outlook.

Help me to free myself from habits which blemish my character.

May I not lose courage and fall back in the old ways, but by your guidance continue to lead me in a positive direction.

For I so wish for a great sense of values and morals to help

others and myself to form a better world.

In a world which calls us in the direction of integrity and authenticity.

May our Great Spirit be with us on our journey and help us

maintain a deep sense of calling to be all we can be.

May our cup overflow with goodness and our souls be filled with joy.

Amen.

A prayer for ourselves (Sharon Douglas)

Great Spirit, there are times when I just want to know what to do. And I look for you to guidance! Help me be kind to myself as I try to change those things in me I do not like. Help me be compassionate with my family and friends who are journeying with me. Help me to be authentic and truthful to those around me. Oh Great Spirit, stand beside me, let me feel your presence. Give me the strength I need to fill my soul with goodness. Amen
 

The Black Spot Story

One day a professor entered the classroom and asked his students to prepare for a surprise test. They waited anxiously at their desks for the test to begin. The professor handed out the question paper, with the text facing down as usual. Once he handed them all out, he asked his students to turn the page and begin. To everyone’s surprise, there were no questions….just a black dot in the center of the page. The professor seeing the expression on everyone’s face, told them the following:

“I want you to write what you see there.”

The students confused, got started on the inexplicable task.

At the end of the class, the professor took all the answer papers and started reading each one of them aloud in front of all the students. All of them with no exceptions, described the black dot, trying to explain its position in the middle of the sheet, etc. etc. etc. After all had been read, the classroom silent, the professor began to explain:

“I am not going to grade on you this, I just wanted to give you something to think about. No one wrote about the white part of the paper. Everyone focused on the black dot – and the same happens in our lives. We have a white paper to observe and enjoy, but we always focus on the dark spots. Our life is a gift given to us by God, with love and care, and we always have reasons to celebrate – nature renewing itself everyday, our friends around us, the job that provides our livelihood, the miracles we see everyday…….

However we insist on focusing only on the dark spots – the health issues that bother us, the lack of money, the complicated relationship with a family member, the disappointment with a friend etc

The dark spots are very small compared to everything we have in our lives, but they are the ones that pollute our minds.

Take your eyes away from the black spots in your life. Enjoy each one of your blessings, each moment that life gives you.

Be happy and live a life positively!

Resource: Inspirational story , – Inspirational Quotes, Pictures and Motivational Thoughts.

This story makes me think of how I look at the world and especially how we search for our vocations or follow our calling in life.  See, it is important to keep in mind that vocation is not only about what we do but about who we are. When we narrowly focus on one thing as in the black dot we are not seeing things around us thus seeing our full potential.  Do we tend to stick to a routine? Do we take risks? Do we play it safe?  Evelyn and James Whitehead put it this way: “Vocation is a gradual revelation – of me to myself by God (higher power). It is who we are, trying to happen.” Our callings have to do with the kind of person we are called to be, the quality of our personhood, the values and attitudes we embody, the integrity and authenticity of our lives. From this vantage point, vocation is less about the particular things we do and more about the spirit with which we do them. “Character is not what you do,” writes James Hillman, “it’s the way you do it.”(Excerpt from Sister Angelica from VCLFF)

So when we find ourselves looking at the dark spots of life, remember it is who we are and who we are trying to be.  Let your life unfold before you, let go, explore, try new things.  It is all about the white space!

Reflection – Avoidance

In avoidance, we simply find ways of avoiding having to face uncomfortable situations, things or activities. The discomfort, for example, may come from unconscious impulses.

Avoidance may include removing oneself physically from a situation. It may also involve finding ways not to discuss or even think about the topic in question.

For example: I dislike another person at work. I avoid walking past their desk. When people talk about them, I say nothing.

Or my son does not like doing homework. Whenever the subject of school comes up, he changes the topic. He also avoids looking directly at me.

Avoidance is a simple way of coping by not having to cope. When feelings of discomfort appear, we find ways of not experiencing them. According to the dynamic theory, avoidance is a major defense mechanism in phobias. And procrastination is another form of avoidance where we put off to tomorrow those things that we can avoid today.

So why do we avoid?

Why do we avoid/procrastinate doing things that we know are very important to us, demand very little effort and time, and would turn out to be very fruitful if we did them regularly?

Such as exercise, meditating for 3-5 mins, reading topics of interest for a few minutes per day, studying for some time, spending time on good habits every day, working on own independent research every day, avoid conflicting situations. I believe that this is a very common problem with slightly different scenarios. I also believe that there must be a scientific reason behind all this and well-studied psychological thought as well.

Minimal short term benefits / fast results: The world is pacing or we choose to observe it advance with such a speed that seems unfathomable. Everyone is in a hurry. We want quick outcome out of whatever we do. People expect to get toned muscles in three months, master yoga within no time or read the Ayurvedic literature and quickly get the most out of it. And so on. The patience level is also decreasing gradually in the masses.

When you think that it is difficult or times consuming to achieve that goal, the brain in the end evaluates such tasks as not fruitful and avoids or procrastinates it. Sometimes it completely makes sense, but other times we have to understand the time factor, the learning curve of doing that task.

Our Brain is in a routine: Your brain is awesome in the matters where there is repetition involved or whose frequency of occurrence is high. For example: Changing the gears of your motorcycle while riding. Remembering to have your breakfast, lunch or dinner, or as simple as your walking style. Your brain gets into such a routine that most of the tasks would be done without you even actually noticing it. Procrastination or ignoring important activities could also get into this routine. Try to break that routine. “Change is important”.

Avoiding change: We live in a society, where our thinking and mentality is molded by the people we are surrounded with, our surroundings, our comfort zone. Our actions and thoughts are in equilibrium with our living ecosystem. If we try to change something within this ecosystem, there will be adjustments which would happen. Sometimes we fear those adjustments, or avoid such things to happen. Try to embrace that change.

Lack of determination: Hans Dholakia, Motivational Life Coach,… Because our knowledge hasn’t matured into realized wisdom and we haven’t added will to what we desired. Usually until some major suffering strikes, we don’t really wake up. Spiritually, it is the work which is within us and neurologically, it is a complex process where many forces work.

Resource: https://www.quora.com/Why-do-we-avoid-procrastinate-doing-things-that-we-know-are-very-important-to-us-demand-very-little-effort-and-time-and-would-turn-out-to-be-very-fruitful-if-we-did-them-regularly

And what can we do to avoid avoiding?

In effect, we can rewire our habit-driven neural circuits by making small changes and gradually picking the harder tasks. The Yoga route: Daily pranayama and meditation will deepen the introspective insights and as we understand better, we can connect the dots and intensify the will, by and by.

To get us to face what we are avoiding, you may have to corner ourselves or otherwise present the situation where we are unable to avoid the situation. If the discomfort is very strong, we may fight back hard, so be careful in what you confront yourself with and who you involve!

Give yourself a choice of two actions, one of which is something you know that you tend to avoid or which is likely to be less desirable. You will pick the path you want in order to avoid the less desirable way.

Presence Prayer by Sharon Douglas

 Let us pray:

Let us pray for the presence of our supreme being in our lives,

To guide us and to shepherd us,

To take our hand and hold us when we are sad,

To have a shoulder to lean on in our times of trouble.

May I be a presence for others as my supreme being is to me.

May I be poised, courteous and at ease in my presence,

May I be a protective presence for those who need it,

And may I remember also to be a calming presence for myself.

For all experiences (good or bad) are better with the presence of a

Caring person who is willing to share of themselves.

So today let our presence to others be one of kindness, compassion,

empathy and of quality.  Amen.

(Transformation by Sharon)

Let us pray, May we ask for hope,

hope to transform us,

hope to help us through.

May we pray for patience to be patient with ourselves.

We are not perfect and the journey is not perfect,

yet we yearn to be good and to do good.

So today let us rejoice in who we are.

Let us embrace the changing of seasons,

to help us in our own transition of life.

May we pray for us to let go and be renewed

by the changing of the seasons.

Let us not be afraid as we know there is someone

or something which is greater than us.

This outside force leads us and challenges to

transform and to let go.

No fears as we change from this day to

the next, to be a better person,

a better friend, a better wife or husband,

or whatever it is you want to be better at.

So embrace the changes, let your life

be your life. Just embrace and be renewed.

God’s Presence or anyone’s presence. How important it is. Use page 278. Friends make us better people. God’s presence or acknowledging a higher power in our lives makes us better people. Because when we believe in something beyond ourselves we are moving towards the positive, we are letting go of our self-centeredness. When we do this, moving into a positive direction, then we take on a set of values and morals. Such as being kind to the other person, we find ways to fulfill one’s life with goodness, help those in need, etc. etc. …… Enough said.

So what is presence and why do we say, be present for her/him? Please be present for me? Your presence matters to me? Or your presence is requested.

Presence is the state or fact of being present, as with others or in a place. It is attendance of company, being in the immediate proximity of another. I was present at the store; I was present at my daughter’s recital. This is the physical sense of the word but what about the spiritual side of presence.

Presence is the ability to project a sense of ease, poise, or self-assurance, especially the quality or manner of a person’s bearing. We talk of a speaker who had a good deal of stage presence or in the deliverance of his speech. One might say: He has a fine presence. Some of us talk about the presence of a higher being in our life. (from the Online Dictionary)

So why is presence important? Why do we want someone to be present for us?

When someone is present for us we appreciate that presence. We have someone to talk to and to listen to us. Having someone there for us and listening makes us feel more alive, we feel our true selves coming through which is why our presence matters.

It is important that we do not ignore the presence of others or our own presence. Our presence is considered the essential features of human existence because of the way we process our experiences not only with ourselves but with others. If it was not for others we would get immersed in our own self-centeredness without fully experiencing the joy of human activity and life. We as human beings have a significance which matters to others and our very existence makes the world go around. In general, our intent is to experience life as fully as possible with the implicit assumption that this is the ultimate reality of our being since everything that matters to us can be traced to our experiences and especially when others are involved.

Wow, so this is deep. We are in direct contact with people of this world every day, but our presence matters in all things and how it is manifested or in other words how we come into presence. See the full potential of this is; we have a sense of being engaged in our experience and in our life. A philosopher, named Heidegger refers to this as “being in the world.” His thought is that our worldly presence matters for how things actually unfold, well beyond any physical processes.

Our presence and those of others in our lives is importance and has great significance because we listen to each other’s troubles, we give each other a sense of worth, we hold each other accountable and we inform each other of things we need to know. We need each other to be a presence with us through this life, in the good and the bad times so that we can feel good about ourselves and be empowered. Let your true self come to the surface because your presence matters in this world and here on earth. Think about how you can be a presence for another. Manifest yourself in someone else’s life by being a positive presence for them today. (_{Excerpts taken from Being There: Heidegger on Why Our Presence Matters By Lawrence Berger)}

We ask our supreme being to make us strong enough to manifest our presence to others in a positive manner. May we be at ease with ourselves and lose our self-centeredness. May we be blessed to come into the presence of others. May we have a true sense of being in this world and making a difference. Amen.

 

Transforming your Life

I was visiting a patient the other day and we got into a conversation about the fall which led to a conversation about transforming. How we are transforming each and every day. Today I am different than I was yesterday, and I will be different tomorrow. I’m a day older, and I think differently because of my experiences yesterday. I miss the summer and the leaves are falling from the trees. There are other things about us that are changing, transforming, and perhaps renewing us.

Reflection – Our human lives are linear—they move forward from birth until death. The years, however, go in a cycle with each repeating seasons and celebrations. When the seasons change for instance, as the fall approaches, do you feel transformed or renewing of yourself? How new and different are life experiences in a given year and can they change your perception of life year after year?

I have not thought of our lives being linear and a cycle before.  We do move from birth to death, yet I feel that we do live a cycle.  As we live the cycles of life much like the trees, the grass, and the flowers.  We have trials and tribulations in our life that change and transform us.  Hopefully the trials and tribulations will bring us closer to who we truly want to be and deepen our awareness of how life should be.

I think that the seasons are transformative and renew us.  Think about the fall and how the leaves change then they fall on the ground where the flowers have since died. It sounds pretty bland and dull.  Some of us look at it negatively; the beautiful colors of flowers are no longer.  Yet, I look at it as shedding things that I no longer want in my life.  That no longer gives me happiness.

Reason being, as we go through the different stages of our lives we find ourselves growing and learning.  The seasons help with this as we search for meaning within the trials of life.  As we go through the fall season we let go of the summer and move towards celebrating thanksgiving.   We learn during this time how to let go of our selfish ways so we can receive the graces of our renewed self.  We learn that we need to go through the suffering trusting our higher power and knowing that there is something better waiting for us.  We need to trust our higher power to show us the way.

I’m sure we have all heard about the happenings with Pope Francis.  Taking all the titles aside, Francis is a wonderful example who we can learn from and a great spiritual man.  He wants to share himself with us and celebrate us as we are all good people.  I believe we can all learn something from him as he himself has gone through many transformations.  He shares his faith in Christ with us and how his belief system renews him each day.  In a way he renews us by his sharing of himself.

I truly believe that as our perceptions change with the seasons of the year they are felt and heard by others around us.  The transformation and renewal is permeated throughout our community.  When this happens life is transformed for all.

Prayer, the lifting of the mind and heart to God, plays an essential role in our life. Without a life of prayer, we risk losing the life of grace in our souls, grace that comes to us first in baptism and later chiefly through the other sacraments and through prayer itself (Catechism of the Catholic Church, 2565). Through prayer we enter into the presence of the Godhead dwelling in us. It is prayer which allows us to adore God, by acknowledging his almighty power; it is prayer that allows us to bring our thanks, our petitions, and our sorrow for sin before our Lord and God. 

While prayer is not a practice unique to some, that is, the teaching Church/synagogue sets before us how we ought to pray. Drawing from the words of Christ, the writings of Scripture and the saints, and the guidance of the Holy Spirit, she supplies us with prayers grounded in religious tradition. Further, our informal, spontaneous prayers, both vocal and meditative, are informed by and shaped by those prayers taught by the Church/synagogue, prayers that are the wellspring for the prayer life of all spiritual/religious. Without the Holy Spirit speaking through the Church and through her saints, we would not know how to pray as we ought (CCC, 2650). 

As the prayers themselves witness, some Churches teach us that we should pray not only directly to God, but also to those who are close to God, such as Mary, Joseph, Jesus, those who have the power to intercede upon our behalf. For example, some pray to the angels to help and watch over us; some pray to the saints in heaven to ask their intercession and assistance; some pray to the Blessed Mother to enlist her aid, to ask her to beg her Son to hear our prayers. Further, we pray not only on our own behalf, but also on the behalf of those souls in purgatory and of those brothers on earth who are in need. Prayer unites us to God; in doing so, we are united to the other members of the Mystical Body. 

This communal aspect of prayer is reflected not only in the nature of prayers, but also in the very words of the prayers themselves. In reading many of the basic formulaic prayers, it will become apparent that prayer is often meant to be prayed in the company of others. Christ himself encouraged us to pray together: “For wherever two or more are gathered together in my name, there I am in the midst of them” (Matt. 18:20). 

 

 

Let our hearts not be troubled. (John 14)

Let our sorrows and sadness be taken away.

We all know we can feel lost and afraid yet there is someone who would like to love us unconditionally. Whether it by God or a mother, father, sister, brother, a spouse. For we all can have a second chance. Isn’t that why we are here?

Will God fill us with a love that will sustain us? We are told God loves unconditionally. That God will sustain us through our troubles and our trials. Give us the support and endurance that we need.

If we let ourselves believe (have faith) God can and will sustain us through this time, this time which we sometimes feel we will not get through.

Sometimes we feel as if we are void of emotions. Perhaps we feel as if doors are beginning to open and some are closing. Perhaps over the holidays we were with the ones we love. Caring for them, loving them and wanting to be without pain and without suffering. We did everything we could to make them and ourselves comfortable.

Jesus tells us to love with all our heart. Let our hearts not be troubled, for he paves the way. He is the way and the truth and the light.

God gave us a wonderful life, a life to be shared. We are grateful for the good times and the bad times we have in our life.

Our hearts become connected with those around us and our hearts ache yet we are here. Things change around us and then we change for the better. We cherish the important things in life. We cherish each day. God is the ever loving teacher who is patient, kind even when we get angry and make mistakes.

In fact I’m told that God loves no matter what, unconditionally, we can do the silliest things over and over again yet it won’t ever affect His love for us.

What a gift!